The Biography of the Prophet

The Biography of the Prophet

#Five_Before_Five

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Take advantage of your blessings from God before they come to an end.

By Aisha Stacey (© 2012 IslamReligion.com)

Published on 17 Sep 2012 - Last modified on 10 Nov 2013 

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Category: Articles > The Prophet Muhammad > Pearls from His Sayings 

FiveBeforeFive.jpgIs it just me or does the time seem to be passing more quickly lately.  One minute it is 2010 the next we are in the final half of 2012.  No matter how badly we want the time to slow down it just moves forward, one second, one minute, and one hour at a time.  Days go by and it feels like minutes.  Before the day’s work even starts it is night time.  God mentions this phenomenon in various places throughout the Quran.

They will say: “We stayed a day or part of a day. Ask of those who keep account.” (Quran 23:113)

…A speaker from among them said, “How long have you stayed (here)?” They said, “We have stayed (perhaps) a day or part of a day.” They said, “Your Lord (alone) knows best how long you have stayed (here)…  (Quran 18:19)

Time passes swiftly, and when we stand before God on the Day of Judgement it will seem as if we have lived, dreamed and hoped for less than a day.  It will seem as if we have worshipped our Creator for only the briefest of time and in only the most lackadaisical way.  We know that many of us will beg God for more time, time to correct our actions and time to worship in a better way.

Until, when death comes to one of them (those who join partners with God), he says: “My Lord! send me back, (Quran 23:99)

Prophet Muhammad, may the mercy and blessings of God be upon him, reiterated this for us. Time will not slow down and we cannot go back to fix the mistakes we make therefore he advised us to take advantage of five, before five.

“Take advantage of five matters before five other matters: your youth, before you become old; your health, before you fall sick; your wealth, before you become poor; your free time before you become busy; and your life, before your death.”[1]

We are advised to take advantage of what time we have.  When we are young we take our youth and energy for granted. We feel as if we have all the time in the world, tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow.  But tomorrow creeps up on us slowly and one of the first things we lose is our youth.  A grey hair appears, there is a niggling pain in our back, or our shoulder or a knee.  As old age approaches people find it harder to fulfil even their obligatory acts of worship.  When it is impossible to bend our knees and put our head on the ground in submission, we want only to be able to go back and pray one extra prayer, fast one extra day the way we did when we were young and full of energy.  The young must take advantage of their youth before old age strips it away. Boundless energy should be used to help others, and to collect as many rewards as possible.

A believer must also take advantage of health before being overcome by sickness, with or without old age. Even young people are affected by ill health and injuries that make it impossible to worship in the way that they would like. Both God and Prophet Muhammad have emphasised the benefits and rewards that come from a believer experiencing pain and suffering. However when a person suffers ill health, he realises just how fragile human beings are. Prophet Muhammad reminds us that we do not know when our health will be taken from us. One day we have all our strength and mental faculties, the next we might be relying on others for even the simplest things.

Wealth is another blessing that comes to us from God.  A believer should give as much as possible in charity while there is still something to give.  We tend to think of charity as money but it is not confined to monetary matters. We give with our hands, our time, our knowledge and our money.  We even give with our smile. However, we should use our monetary wealth to worship and please God before it is taken from us. We have no way of knowing when God will see fit to remove our wealth from us. People are rich one day and homeless the next.  We must spend our wealth for the sake of God before we do not have the means to do so.  And this will not go unrewarded.

The likeness of those who spend their money for God’s sake, is as the likeness of a grain (of corn), it grows seven ears, every single ear has a hundred grains, and God multiplies (increases the reward) for whom He wills, and God is All-Sufficient for His creatures needs, All Knower. (Quran 2:261)

Free time is another great blessing from God that each of us possesses, regardless of how busy we think we are. Spending this time wisely means not wasting it in fruitless activities that have no benefit.  Even the simplest of acts can become worthwhile by simply doing them for the sake of God. If we free ourselves from fruitless time wasting activities it is possible the time to increase our religious deeds.  When a person chooses wisely, worldly deeds can also be done for the sake of God.  Remember that time moves inexorably forward.  Do it today because you may not have a tomorrow.  Use your free time wisely today before life is filled with worldly obligations that contain no benefit whatsoever unless you live every moment to please God.

The final thing we have been advised to take advantage of is, life before death overtakes us. Every morning we should thank God for another day. Each day is a chance to do well; to spend in charity, to worship longer, harder, or in a better way.  It is a chance to spread good cheer, smile, and pay that extra dollar or two in charity. It is a chance to perform countless random acts of kindness.  We have become relaxed about the reality of death.  At some point, perhaps in a matter of hours, minutes, or even seconds, our life will be taken away from us.  Prophet Muhammad advises us to take advantage of the time we have.  Do what you can now, not tomorrow, for tomorrow may never come.

This reminder from the Prophet Muhammad deals with responsibility, wisdom, foresight and time management, but it is not the only time he reminded us of the importance of being aware of our blessings and using them to our own advantage.  We are constantly reminded, throughout the Quran and the traditions of the Prophet, that time is fleeting and that every little thing we do is able to become a source of great reward.  Prophet Muhammad also said, “Three things follow the deceased [to his grave], two of them return and one remains with him. His family, wealth and deeds follow him, while his family and wealth return, his deeds remain with him.”[2]

ARE YOU READY FOR ISLAM?

ARE YOU READY FOR ISLAM?

THE ONLY SOLUTION

INTRODUCTION

We are living in a time unlike any other period in the history of mankind. We have mastered

technology to a degree unimaginable just fifty years ago. Various technological achievements have

gradually transformed the way human beings perform day to day routines as well as how we interact

with one another. However, despite these accomplishments, we have never lived in a more

tumultuous time than now. We have simultaneously become the most capable and the most confused

generation in history. We are living in times of extreme uncertainty and in an age of extreme

opposites. The wealth that certain societies have amassed today dwarfs any past civilizations’ at their

most prosperous. Yet at the same time the divide between those who possess such wealth and the

poor of the world has never been wider. Even with the advances in medicine and agricultural science,

epidemic disease and wide spread famine are approaching record numbers. Most of the technological

advances we see have been transformed into the most awe inspiring destructive forces the world has

ever known. If there was ever a time in the history of the Earth that man could bring about what

certain people call ‘Armageddon’ or the ‘apocalypse’ , it is indeed now. The nuclear family has

become a victim of these times. Drugs, drunkenness, lewdness, and an all-around atmosphere of selfdestructiveness

abound and our societies are suffering from the consequences of such behavior.

People do not feel safe in their homes, whether it is the threat of an intruder who is desperate to get

money for drugs or the fact that any minute their homes could be incinerated by falling missiles. The

ideals of a ‘liberal’ society have opened the door to all things detrimental to human survival. Children

are exposed to things that they never should see at such young ages. Yet in the ‘liberal’ society, the

desires of the individual take precedence over what is most beneficial to the human family as a

whole. People have become slaves to their lower passions because of what is fed to them by the

society as ‘liberation’. The result is decadence with no parallel in history. Never have there been more

alcoholics, serial killers, rapists, and child molesters than now. This is considered to be a ‘civilized’

society. People are desperate for a solution. A solution that is neither a quick fix nor a band-aid but a

solution that goes to the core of w hat plagues mankind and provides a lasting cure. That solution is

Islam.

ISLAM: THE CURE

According to the National Center for Injury Prevention and Control (U.S.A.), alcohol related vehicle

crashes kills someone every 32 minutes and non-fatal injuries occur every two minutes. Fatalities

involving alcohol accounted for 40% of all traffic deaths in 2000 and drugs other than alcohol were

factors in an additional 18% of all deaths. Alcohol related accidents totaled a cost of over $51 billion

dollars in 2000 alone. The negative effect of alcohol and drugs in our ‘civilized’ society cannot be

denied. Everyone in our so-called advanced societies has in some way been affected by the evils of

these vices. The National Crime Victimization Survey (U.S.A) reports that 28% of the victims of

violence reported that their attacker was under the influence of alcohol alone or in combination with

other drugs. Alcohol related acts of workplace violence accounted for 35% of all incidents and 25%

of jail inmates said that they were under the influence while arguing with family, friends, spouse, etc.

Think of the countless incidents of senseless violence that could have been avoided had neither

alcohol nor drugs been involved. Islam is the only world religion that addresses the evils of alcohol

and drugs in its texts and removes any ambiguity as to the position of Islam on the issue.

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O you who believe! Intoxicants, gambling, Al-Ansaab, and Al-Azlaam (arrows for seeking

luck or decision) are an abomination of Shaitaan's (Satan) handiwork. So avoid (strictly all)

that (abomination) in order that you may be successful. (The Noble Qur’an, 5:90)

Shaitaan (Satan) wants only to excite enmity and hatred between you with intoxicants and

gambling, and hinder you from the remembrance of Allah and from As-Salaat (the

prayer). So, will you not then abstain? (5:91)

What is evident is that not only does the Qur’an address the purpose of alcohol and drugs as a means

of causing hatred between people and as a distraction from worship but also in the same verses

condemn the destructive vice of gambling as well. Name one other system that has inspired almost

23% of the Earth’s population to completely turn away from alcohol, drugs, and gambling. Of course

in every religion there will be those who do not adhere to some principles of their doctrines but the

percentage of alcohol/drug related crimes, deaths, etc. in even the most unrestricted Islamic societies

are insignificant when compared elsewhere.

The economy of our world is changing so fast, one can not keep pace with the fluctuations of

whether we are in periods of growth or constriction. At present the world economy is reeling and

individuals, institutions, and even entire nations are being crippled by the weight of debt. Debt is a

true measure of wealth. If the masses of the people are kept in insurmountable levels of debt, they

are not a threat to those who control where wealth actually ends up. The economic systems

employed by ‘modern’ societies are designed to keep a large portion of the population in some form

of debt by allowing them to use things that they cannot really afford, enriching the corporations who

provide these products and stifling the growth and creativity of the purchaser with an ever present

amount owed. This is made possible by the use of charging ‘interest’ on loans. This system is further

criminalized when one considers the fact that the lower the income of an individual or institution, the

higher the rate of interest one has to pay. This system has been used by the World Bank and the

International Monetary Fund to wreak havoc in the so-called developing nations by loaning large

sums of money to nations that can not possibly pay it back, forcing these nations to relinquish

control of its own natural and human resources. Allah, in the Qur’an, speaks directly to the evils of

this institution and provides mankind with the solution.

Those who eat Ribaa (interest) will not stand (on the Day of Resurrection) except like the

standing of a person beaten by Shaitaan (Satan) leading him to insanity. That is because

they say: "Trading is only like Ribaa (interest)," whereas Allah has permitted trading and

forbidden Ribaa (interest). So whosoever receives an admonition from his Lord and stops

eating Ribaa (interest) shall not be punished for the past; his case is for Allah (to judge); but

whoever returns [to Ribaa (interest)], such are the dwellers of the Fire - they will abide

therein. (2:275)

O you who believe! Be afraid of Allah and give up what remains (due to you) from Ribaa

(interest) (from now onward), if you are (really) believers. (2:278)

Acts of kindness with regards to the debtor is a command from Allah and the manners of how to

justly deal with one who is in debt is given by Allah.

And if the debtor is in a hard time (has no money), then grant him time till it is easy for him

to repay, but if you remit it by way of charity, that is better for you if you did but know.

(2:280)

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The only result of an economic system that relies on the debt of others is wealth for some and

poverty for most. People are literally starving not only in countries like Malawi, Rwanda, and

Ethiopia but also in what are supposed to be well to do countries. Travel to any major city in the

United States and you will find a large segment of the population literally sleeping in boxes and

dumpsters not far from some of the wealthiest people in the world. How did this disparity come to

be? Is the success of a society determined by its selfishness? Islam forbids the hoarding of wealth and

demands that those who have wealth give to those who are poor in order to purify it. This

commandment is given many times in the Qur’an.

(Charity is) for Fuqaraa (the poor), who in Allah's Cause are restricted (from travel), and

cannot move about in the land (for trade or work). The one who knows them not, thinks that

they are rich because of their modesty. You may know them by their mark, they do not beg

of people at all. And whatever you spend in good, surely Allah knows it well. (2:273)

Truly those who believe, and do deeds of righteousness, and perform As-Salaat (Iqaamat-as-

Salaat), and give Zakaat (charity), they will have their reward with their Lord. On them shall

be no fear, nor shall they grieve. (2:77)

The Zakaat system in Islam is a fundamental principle of worship. It is required of every Muslim who

is able to give the Zakaat. The Zakaat is for the poor only and not to pay someone’s salary or for

other extra curricular activities as seen in most religions’ idea of charity. It is the only system in which

the wealth of a society is spread out among the people to ensure that the divide between the wealthy

and poor is not so vast. Allah also gives the commandment to be gentle and understanding with

those to whom you have given loans. Under the current system of laws and regulations, the poor

who cannot pay are punished further with interest rate increases, late fees, etc. Islam is a mercy to

man as it has come to eradicate these forms of oppression.

Today, 42 million people are said to be living with AIDS and in 2002 alone, more than 5 million

people contracted the virus. Over 1 million people in Angola are infected with AIDS. As a barometer

of the current morals in our technologically advanced yet morally backward society, consider that in

1970 there were only two known sexually transmitted diseases. Today, there are 25 known major

STDs. Approximately 15 million people contract an STD every year and there are over 65 million

people just in the U.S. alone who are currently living with an incurable STD (California Policy

Research Center, Univ. of California). Islam is the only system of living that has within it, regulations

that hinder the prevalence of the type of behavior that cause these vile conditions. Islam demands

that the chastity of the man and the woman in society be guarded meticulously. There are several

layers of this profound system that, if implemented, prevents the situations that our current societies

find themselves in.

Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect

their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.). That is purer for them. Verily, Allah is All-

Aware of what they do. (24:30).

And tell the believing women to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and

protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.) and not to show off their adornment

except only that which is apparent and to draw their veils all over Juyubihinna (i.e. their

bodies, faces, necks and bosoms, etc.) and not to reveal their adornment except to their

husbands, their fathers, their husband's fathers, their sons, their husband's sons, their

brothers or their brother's sons, or their sister's sons, or their (Muslim) women (i.e. their

sisters in Islam), or the (female) slaves whom their right hands possess, or old male servants

who lack vigor, or small children who have no sense of the shame of sex. And let them not

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stamp their feet so as to reveal what they hide of their adornment. And all of you beg Allah to

forgive you all, O believers, that you may be successful. (24:31)

As human beings, it is very important to remember that one of the things that distinguish us from

the animals is the fact that we wear clothing. It is an honorable thing to cover the body for it, in

truth, determines how civilized a society is. Throughout history, humans who did not cover or barely

covered at all were considered backwards, barbaric, and uncultured. Now we live in a time where it

is encouraged to uncover and those who do cover themselves are labeled ‘backward’. Men and

especially women are being convinced that to expose themselves is freedom. Today, people have no

shame in displaying to strangers that which should be honored and protected. Most people would

not go around displaying their bank account numbers nor would they just leave their most precious

jewels and heirlooms laying around for everyone to see. So why when it comes to ourselves, our

wives, and daughters, do we allow any and everyone to see any and everything? Thus unleashing the

beast in man who, when confronted with more exposure than he is emotionally equipped to handle,

begins to engage in the type of illicit behavior that brings the rape, death, and disease we now find

around us. Allah says,

O Prophet! Tell thy wives and daughters, and the believing women, that they should cast

their outer garments over their persons (when abroad): that is most convenient, that they

should be known (as such) and not molested. And Allah is Oft- Forgiving, Most Merciful.

(33:59)

O Children of Adam! We have bestowed raiment upon you to cover yourselves (screen your

private parts, etc.) and as an adornment, and the raiment of righteousness, that is

better. Such are among the Ayaat (proofs, evidences, verses, lessons, signs, revelations, etc.)

of Allah, that they may remember (i.e. leave falsehood and follow truth. (7:26)

O Children of Adam! Let not Shaitaan (Satan) deceive you, as he got your parents [Adam

and Hawwa (Eve)] out of Paradise, stripping them of their raiments, to show them their

private parts. Verily, he and Qabîluhu (his soldiers from the jinns or his tribe) see you from

where you cannot see them. Verily, We made the Shayaatin (devils) Auliyaa' (protectors and

helpers) for those who believe not. (7:27)

In any society where sexual promiscuity increasingly becomes the norm, the fabric of the society, the

family, is gradually destroyed. In the U.S., 28% of all children live in single parent households and of

them, 84% live with the mother. 79% of all pregnancies of women under 20 are unmarried teens.

Condoms and birth control are band-aid solutions that hardly work because to solve the problem is

to delve into the root of the problem. The root of the problem is that morality has been defined by

trends and trends come and go. We need a system of morality higher than what man can produce.

Humans have an internal instinct that recognizes that there is One authority in our lives and that

obedience to him is the key to success.

And (remember) when your Lord brought forth from the Children of Adam, from their loins,

their seed (or from Adam's loin his offspring) and made them testify as to themselves

(saying): "Am I not your Lord?" They said: "Yes! We testify," lest you should say on the

Day of Resurrection: "Verily, we have been unaware of this."(7:172)

Racism and tribalism have been the cause of many conflicts throughout the history of man. People

who judge based on skin color or who hate because of race or tribe are some of the worst enemies to

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mankind. Islam has come to free us from the dangers of racism. Allah tells us in the Qur’an that it is

righteousness that distinguishes one from another and not the appearance or tribe.

“O mankind! We created you from a single (pair) of a male and a female, and made you into

nations and tribes, that ye may know each other (not that ye may despise (each other). Verily

the most honored of you in the sight of Allah is (he who is) the most righteous of you. And

Allah has full knowledge and is well acquainted (with all things)” (Noble Qur’an 49:13)

And among His Signs is the creation of the heavens and the earth, and the variations

in your languages and your colors: verily in that are Signs for those who know

(Noble Qur’an 30:22)

Islam is a program for life. Islam is designed by Allah for us to practice in order to purge the evils

from ourselves. When the Muslims are commanded to gather for prayer, race cannot be a factor. The

lines of prayer are not determined by race. The Hajj (pilgrimage) of the Muslims to Makkah forces

the king to dress like the peasant. It forces the white man to go through the same trials of Hajj as a

black man. These forms of worship along with the Zakaat and others, if properly implemented, can

bring about true change in the self and throughout the entire society. Islam, however, is a religion of

belief and action. To be a good Muslim, one has to be prepared to work. Islam requires discipline and

self-restraint. Islam is a lifestyle of praying and begging to Allah in the middle of the night when others

are sleep. Islam requires one to fast to develop the strength to endure the calls of hunger and the

lower desires and to be able to resist unlawful temptations. Islam is a lifestyle of acquiring knowledge.

There are so many aspects of Islam that one can spend his or her entire life learning different things

in Islam. Allah says in Qur’an,” It is only (those who have knowledge) among His slaves that

fear Allah. Verily, Allah is All Mighty, Oft-Forgiving”(35:28). The Muslim has to have a thirst

for knowledge of this religion because in the knowledge of Islam comes the proper understanding

and implementation. Islam requires courage in the face of opposition and ridicule. Since the

beginning of the establishment of Islam, Muslims have been under attack. Sometimes it is an

ideological attack and sometimes it is an all out physical assault. The Muslim, however, has to have

the faith and the courage to continue to believe and to practice no matter what others in society may

do, say, or think. If it is ‘unpopular’ to be a Muslim, then it is even more important that we continue

to be seen and heard practicing our faith. We should remember what Allah says in the Qur’an…

(They are) those who are patient ones, those who are true (in Faith, words, and deeds), and

obedient with sincere devotion in worship to Allah. Those who spend [give the Zakaat and

alms in the Way of Allah] and those who pray and beg Allah's Pardon in the last hours of the

night (3:17).

So do not become weak (against your enemy), nor be sad, and you will be superior (in

victory) if you are indeed (true) believers (3:139).

They intend to put out the Light of Allah (i.e. the religion of Islam, this Qur'an, and Prophet

Muhammad SAW) with their mouths. But Allah will complete His Light even though the

disbelievers hate it (61:8).

Our world today is plagued with so many ills that one may be tempted to lose hope and give in to

despair. What I have given is a brief summary of some of the benefits of Islam and how Islam brings

about true change in this society starting with the individual and moving beyond to the world. There

are many additional topics that I did not cover wherein Islam has the cure in place, ready at our

fingertips and I encourage you to investigate further. If you have been searching for answers to the

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above mentioned problems as well as others, I encourage you to take a serious look at Islam.

Remember, Islam requires action, discipline, knowledge, courage, strength and patience… Dear reader, are you

hard-working enough? Are you disciplined enough? Are you smart enough? Are you courageous enough?

Are you patient enough? Are you strong enough? In other words, …ARE YOU READY FOR

ISLAM?

SOURCES

1. The Noble Qur’an

2. National Center for Injury Prevention and Control (NHTSA 2001a)

3. U.S. Department of Justice – Bureau of Justice Statistics, National Crime Victimization

Survey 2000-2001 (NCVS).

4. Center for Disease Control, HIV/AIDS Surveillance Report – Joint United Nations

Programme on HIV/AIDS 2002.

5. US Census Bureau March 1998 Supplement to the Current Population Survey

6. US Census Bureau Household and Family Characteristics March 1998

7. California Policy Research Center, Univ. of California

Best documentary explains the life of the #Prophet_Mohammed from his birth to his death

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سبحانك ربي ما ابدعك

سبحانك ربي ما ابدعك

Curing Aggressive Behavior in #Children

The process of upbringing is a sublime undertaking, because it helps in the formation and development of the human character. This sublime endeavor requires a lot of effort, patience, perseverance, and wisdom in order to fulfill and carry it out. It becomes more challenging when it deals with solving the psychological problems of children, such as aggressiveness. In fact, numerous families suffer aggressive behavior on the part of their children, which is why a sound upbringing involves curing aggression in children and helping them build sober, stable and benevolent characters.

What is "aggressive behavior"?

The word "behavior" means one's line of conduct and manners, while the word "aggressive" is an adjective derived from "aggression", which means any harmful action or offensive activity towards others.

Thus, we can define aggressive behavior as any offensive and harmful action exercised by a child or an adult against others. It can include physically beating, abusing or any other form of aggression.

Types of aggressive behavior

The child's inclination towards aggressiveness can be noticed by observing his behavior such as quarreling, seeking revenge, disputing, stubbornness, defiance, enjoying criticizing others and disclosing their faults, ascribing weakness and disability to others and belittling them, the tendency to torture, creating disturbance and derangement, slandering others, causing trouble and throwing tantrums. Although there are many types of aggressive behavior, we will mention only the most important and prevalent ones:

1. Stubbornness: It is the simplest form of aggression, and it is clearly noticed in the behavior of children when they reject the requests, commands or the instructions of their parents or relatives. However, it normally goes away under the influence of normal social interaction and growth.

2. Quarreling: This behavior is manifested in the child's beating his siblings and peers, pushing them, pulling them by their hair, or publicly taking their belongings by force. Research shows that males are more ready to quarrel and fight over things than females, and also showed that the tendency to fight decreases with age.

3. Deception and abuse: This is clear in the desire to enrage other children, plotting against them, harming and torturing them, causing troubles to them, or spoiling their games. Moreover, the aggressive child always targets the weak points of his victims. This means that he does not randomly select his victim. However, he chooses a child who will submissively consent to the humiliation and provocations against him. 

The danger of aggressive behavior

The presence of an aggressive child or more within a family has a bad effect on its comfort and tranquility. Besides, it has many other negative effects, whether morally or materially, including: harming, beating, abusing his siblings and taking their toys by force. This will enrage them, so they will express their anger through either quarreling with him and fighting back, or resorting to crying in order to express their discontent and discomfort.

In addition to this, the aggressive child may also cause damage to the furniture. He creates an atmosphere of chaos in the house by turning everything upside down after the mother has exerted an effort to put them into order. He also tries to control all that is going around him, as if he is the master of the situation. Furthermore, he disturbs all the family members by raising a riot and making noise. For example, when his father returns exhausted from his work and wants to rest for a while, he finds the house a hub of uncontrollable noise, which could even reach the neighbors and disturb them. Additionally, his aggression may be transferred to his siblings, and this infection may be even extended to his neighbors and schoolmates.

Therefore, the phenomenon of aggressiveness should be cured as fast as possible due to all its accompanying disadvantages and dangers. The family, school and the entire society should join hands together in an effort to overcome this dangerous problem. This is because this problem can be reinforced in the child's personality, and if the aggressive behavior grows with him, he would harm many others and harm himself as well.

The behavioral therapy

When the family manages to diagnose and identify the aggressive child, and realize the driving forces behind his aggressiveness, they should try to replace his negative characteristics with positive alternatives. They should know that behavioral therapy mainly aims at achieving radical changes in the individual's behavior in order to make his life and the lives of those around him more positive and active. Thus, getting rid of the factors that lead to aggression among children is the first step to cure this problem, and in the following table, we will briefly mention the causes of aggressiveness and their remedy:

Cause and Remedy

Surplus physical energy:

Allowing him to practice any sports he likes for a long time, in order to drive him away from directing his power towards harming others.

The desire for self-assertion:

Assign him some tasks to perform in front of his siblings and friends, like asking him to sing a song, express himself, or narrate a story, and then praise his work and encourage him after he completes it.

Restriction of freedom:

Preparing a place in the house for him to freely move and play in; accompanying him to public parks and play grounds, preferably with his playmates.

Social frustration and a sense of jealousy and inequity:

We should make the child feel our love, sympathy, compassion and solicitude for him. We should also fulfill his requests in moderation in order to make his character more normal and well-mannered.

Imitation:

Guarding against watching horror films and fighting scenes which are aired regularly on satellite channels.

In addition to the aforementioned guidelines, we should try to utilize the time of an aggressive child with beneficial activities in order to prevent him from feeling lonely. Moreover, we should bring him appropriate toys, and help him to develop his hobbies and practice them. It is worth mentioning that curing an aggressive child requires a continuous observation for his motions, behaviors, and conversations, and his attitude towards people and things.

Additionally, we should follow his progress and monitor the response to these attempts of curing his aggressiveness. He must feel that we are close to him. He also must feel that we love him and care about him. We should also give him gifts as a kind of reward whenever we notice a change or progress in his manner. In short, we will not be able to overcome the problem of aggressiveness unless we precisely follow the previously mentioned steps, especially when all the family members cooperate to help their beloved child break out of his pattern of aggressive behavior.

Finally, we must supplicate Allaah The Almighty to help us in our quest, since supplicating Allaah The Almighty for the family is one of the attributes of the believers. Allaah The Almighty Said describing the true worshipers (what means): {And those who say, “Our Lord, grant us from among our wives and offspring comfort to our eyes and make us an example for the righteous.} [Quran 25:74].

The Virtue of #Nurturing Girls - I

This article in its two parts, Allaah willing, will be about a righteous good deed, and whoever performs it perfectly, according to its required conditions, will attain three things:

First: he will be veiled from Hell and never enter it.

Second: on the Day of the Greatest Terror, (i.e. the Day of Judgment), he will be gathered in the company of the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam.

Third: Paradise will be guaranteed for him, where he will be in the company of the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam.

What an excellent and great reward this is! This great reward, O believers, requires that certain conditions be fulfilled perfectly.

What is this deed and what are its conditions?

I say, seeking the help of Allaah The Exalted, that it is to take care of girls, being in charge of them and looking after their affairs and interests. That is the position of our religion with the woman whom it honors, maintains, and guards; it encourages men to enter Paradise and receive great rewards should they take care of her and guard her.

How great the favors of Allaah The Almighty are on the daughters of Eve and how sad that some people show ingratitude and deny them!

The Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said in an authentic Hadeeth on the authority of the Mother of the Believers ‘Aa’ishah, may Allaah be pleased with her: "Whichever (people) are tried by any of them (girls), and he treats them kindly, they will screen him from the fire (of Hell)." [Al-Bukhaari and Muslim]

He further said: "Whoever has three girls and is patient with them and clothes them from what he has, they will veil him from the fire (of Hell)."

That is the first reward that you, O slave of Allaah, would receive for that work, which is to be screened and veiled from the fire of Hell, and whoever is drawn away from the fire and admitted to Paradise has indeed attained his desire.

May Allaah make us all among those who attain that reward!

Concerning the second reward, which is to be gathered in the company of the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, it was narrated on the authority of Anas, may Allaah be pleased with him, that he said, “The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: ‘Whoever looks after two girls until they attain the age of maturity, would come on the Day of Judgment with me and him being (as close to each other) as these (and he joined his fingers).’” [Muslim]

As for the third reward, then consider the following texts:

It was narrated on the authority of Jaabir, may Allaah be pleased with him, that the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: "‘Whoever has three daughters whom he gives refuge to, provides for and shows mercy to, Paradise is certainly guaranteed for him.” A man asked, “And (for) two, O Messenger of Allaah?” He replied: “And also (for the one who has) two (daughters)." [Ahmad] [Al-Bukhaari in Al-Adab Al-Mufrad]

It was narrated on the authority of Abu Sa‘eed, may Allaah be pleased with him, that the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: "No one has three or two daughters or sisters, and he fears Allaah regarding them and is kind to them, except that he will enter Paradise."

It was narrated on the authority of Anas, may Allaah be pleased with him, that he said, “The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: ‘Whoever has two daughters or sisters to whom he is kind as long as they are with him, he and I will be in Paradise (as close to each other) as these (and then he put two of his fingers together).’”

What a great reward this is! And, what an excellent position this is!

However, such great rewards have heavy qualifications and various objectives that must be realized by great striving and patience.

What are these conditions and restrictions?

All the conditions are included in his (the Prophet's, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam,) saying: "And he is kind to them."

To be kind to girls in such a way as to befit the Sharee‘ah is the all-inclusive condition and the greatest qualification. The narrations previously mentioned came to explicate and clarify in detail this general reference. The Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: "…Whom he gives refuge to, provides for and shows mercy to."

Al-Haafith, may Allaah have mercy upon him, said, "All these terms are included under the term "Ihsaan" (to be kind)."

What is the meaning of giving refuge to them? What is intended by providing for them? And, how should we show mercy to them?

Giving refuge has three facets:

First: Giving her refuge with a good righteous mother, to be an example for her to follow. The first stage of giving refuge to girls is to keep them with a righteous pious chaste mother to maintain and guard them. Have you not heard the advice of the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam: "Then, succeed (by choosing) the religious woman lest you would lose (good)"?

Second: Giving her refuge in her boudoir, inside her house, which is to teach her to abide in her house and not to come out unless there is a necessity, an urgent need or an act of worship. In other words: "To attend the goodness and supplications of Muslims."

That is the significance of the statement of Allaah The Almighty (which means): {And abide in your houses.} [Quran 33:33]

Allaah The Almighty commands women to abide in their houses, for it is more suitable to screen them and guard their lives.

The Virtue of #Nurturing Girls - II

Consider, may Allaah have mercy upon you, how Allaah The Almighty mentions houses in relation to women in three occasions in His Book, despite the fact that these houses (in most cases) belong to their guardians. Allaah The Almighty Says (what means):

• {And remember what is recited in your houses of the verses of Allaah and wisdom.} [Quran 33:34]

• {And abide in your houses.} [Quran 33:33]

• {Do not turn them out of their [husbands'] houses.} [Quran 65:1]

So, be eager to bring up your daughters to abide in the home, and adhere to firmness for it is more beneficial for their religion and more likely to bring you honor in this world and the Hereafter.

Third: Giving her shelter in a house full of Thikr (mentioning and remembering Allaah), worship and righteous deeds. It is true that some women do not come out of their houses, but their houses, at the same time, are inhabited by the human devils and the jinn, where women do not veil themselves from the men who are not their Mahrams (unmarriageable relatives), and their sons and those of the paternal and maternal uncles and aunts go and come and enter everywhere they like with neither a cover nor a veil.

The same is true of the driver and the servant, as if they have foster relations with them, for they enter upon the women of the house with no veil. Such a house is not fit to be a refuge, for it is a house in which honor is violated.

Also, some women do not come out of their houses, but their houses are filled with corruption-causing devices and channels of singing and adultery. The girl there thus learns, listens to and sees what is unlawful, is tempted away from her religion and strays and gets corrupted more than if she goes to markets.

Is this a refuge, O slaves of Allaah?

The real refuge lies in a screening shelter that guards and maintains your honor: "Whoever has three daughters whom he gives refuge, provides for and shows mercy to, Paradise is inevitably guaranteed for him."

That was the refuge; now what is intended by providing for them?

This is explained in the narration of Muslim: "Whoever looks after two girls until they attain the age of maturity." An-Nawawi, may Allaah have mercy upon him, said, "It means to raise them and provide them with sustenance." It is further explained in his (the Prophet's saying: "And dresses them from what he has."

Yes, O slaves of Allaah! To provide the woman with what she necessarily needs of food, clothing and sustenance is among the obligatory duties and one of the greatest acts that bring men closer to Allaah.

Men should provide women with these things so that they would not need to come out of the house to work and earn their living. They should provide them with these necessities so that they would not think about committing a sin or deviation.

The Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: "To provide for them," and did not say to make them transgress by giving them what is beyond their needs as many fathers, may Allaah guide them, do with their daughters. They give their daughters all that they ask for, and whenever one's daughter has a desire for a certain thing, they hasten to buy it for her to fulfill her desire, and whenever they request anything, they hurry with full power in response to her command.

This kind of indulgence destroys the girl and would shorten her marital life. Once such a girl moves to the house of her husband and is no longer pampered, she rebels against her husband because she misses what she was brought up on.

On the other extreme are other men who fall short of fulfilling the necessities of their women, shouting at them things like, "Why do you not come out and work like so-and-so who obtains her needs and what is sufficient for her?" Allaah The Almighty Says (what means): {And [they are] those who, when they spend, do so not excessively or sparingly but are ever, between that, [justly] moderate.} [Quran 25:67]

The third qualification and condition included under being kind (to girls) lie in his statement: "And shows mercy to them." What is the real nature of mercy? What is intended by it?

The first thing that occurs to the mind is its apparent and general meaning; to show mercy to them is to sympathize and show pity for them, not to beat them, and everything else included in the meaning of mercy, which are, no doubt, true. However, the real mercy one should show girls lies in two things:

First: to show mercy to them by earnestly seeking and seriously working to keep them away from the Wretched Settlement that is the Fire. That is to bring them up on the rituals of Islam, the establishment of prayers, adherence to Hijaab and the maintenance of their chastity: {O you who have believed, protect yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is people and stones.} [Quran 66:6]

The man who shows sympathy towards his daughters, pampers them and is spiritually and materially kind to them, and, at the same time does not command them to perform prayers, to observe fast or to adhere to Hijaab, is in fact a tyrant and plain enemy of them, for he is not sincere in advising them, and he does not help them and keep them away from the Fire of Hell.

That is the real mercy, O company of believers. The Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: "My parable in relation to that of my Ummah (nation) is like a man who kindled a fire and when it lit all around him, moths and insects started falling into the fire. I am there to catch hold of you (in order to save you) from the fire. But you plunge into it and overpower my efforts.”

This is only one of many forms with which Allaah The Almighty honored the woman and raised her esteem. Which honor and high esteem are better than exhorting men to enter Paradise and be gathered in the company of the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, and kept away from the Fire of Hell, if they are kind to the girls in their care, look after their affairs and take care of them perfectly?

So, fear Allaah, O slave-girl of Allaah, and be proud of that honor, and remember that the final statement of the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, before he left this world was: "And I advise you to be kind and good to women."

Thus, he commanded and advised us to be good and kind to you, O woman. So, be a good helper to your guardians to achieve that great task, and bear in mind that your honor and glory lie in your adherence to your religion. And, O men, be good and kind to your girls – your daughters and sisters, and be aware of the fact that this great reward you have been told about is qualified by these heavy qualifications, which are easy for the person on whom Allaah The Almighty makes it easy, and within the capacity of him who strives his utmost and is eager to do them.

And Allaah is the guardian of success.

Are We True Muslims? - II

Two Kinds of Muslims

Now let’s talk about the two kinds of Muslims which are the ‘Partial Muslims’ and the ‘True Muslims’

Partial Muslims

Some Muslims profess faith in Allah Almighty and the Messenger, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, and declare Islam as their religion; but then they confine this Islam to only a part of their lives. To the extent of this part, they express great attachment to Islam, extensively perform worship rituals like Prayers, use of the rosary, remembrance of Allah Almighty. They are very particular in conforming to outward piety in matters like food, dress and other external social, cultural customs. Thus they are fully 'religious'.

But beyond these conventions their lives are not according to what Allah Almighty commands. If they love, they love for the sake of their own selves, their country, their nation, or for anything else, but not for Allah Almighty. If they become displeased, are angry, hate someone, make enemies, or wage war, it too is for the sake of some worldly or selfish interest. Their relations with their businesses, their wives and children, families, societies — will all be to a great extent unaffected by Islam and based on secular considerations. As landlords, traders, rulers, soldiers, professional people — in all spheres they will behave as if they are autonomous, having no connection with their position as Muslims. When such people establish cultural, educational and political norms and institutions, these have nothing to do with Islam, even though they may seem Islamic.

True Muslims

The second kind of Muslims are those who completely merge their personalities and existences into Islam. All the roles they have become subordinate to the one role of being Muslims. They live as Muslims when they live as fathers, sons, husbands or wives, businessmen, landlords, laborers, employers. Their feelings, their desires, their ideologies, their thoughts and opinions, their likes and dislikes, all are shaped by Islam. Allah's guidance holds complete sway over their hearts and minds, their eyes and ears, their bellies, their sexual desires, their hands and feet, their bodies and souls. Neither their loves nor their hatreds are formed independently of Islamic criteria. Whether they fight or make friends, it is purely for the sake of Islam. If they give anything to anybody, it is because Islam requires it to be given. If they withhold anything from anybody, it is because Islam wants it to be withheld.

And this attitude of theirs is not limited to personal lives; their public lives, their societies are also based entirely on Islam. Their collectivity exists for Islam alone; their collective behavior is governed by the precepts of Islam alone.

What Kind of Muslims Allah Almighty Desires

The above two kinds of Muslims are significantly different from each other, even if, legally, both are included in the Ummah (Nation) and the word `Muslim' is applied to both equally. Historically the first kind of Muslims have made no achievement which may be worthy of mention or which merits our being proud of it. Nothing these ‘Muslims’ have done has left an Islamic imprint on the pages of world history. The world has received no benefit from their existence; indeed, Islam has suffered decay because of them. Because of the preponderance of such `Muslims' in Muslim society, power and world leadership largely passed into the hands of rebels against Allah Almighty. For these `Muslims' have been content merely with ensuring that they enjoy the freedom to live religiously within the narrow confines of their private lives.

Allah Almighty never desired to have such `Muslims'. Nor did He Almighty send His Prophets or reveal His Books to make them. Indeed it is the second kind of Muslims who are desired by Allah Almighty. Only they can ever accomplish anything worthwhile from the Islamic point of view.

Supreme Loyalty to Allah Almighty

This is not a phenomenon peculiar to Islam. In fact, no way of life can ever prevail in the world if its followers accord their faith and commitment a subordinate position in their lives. Or, if they live and die for causes other than their faith. We see even today that only those are considered real and true followers of a creed or ideology who are loyal to it with their hearts and souls. Every creed in the world desires such adherents and no creed can prevail in the world except through such followers.

However, there is an important difference between Islam and other creeds and ideologies. Although others demand from men total loyalty and dedication, they in fact have no such right upon him, their claims are entirely unjustified. The objects they place before men are not the kind of objects for which a human being should sacrifice anything. But Allah the Almighty for whom Islam demands the sacrifice of life has a right upon us. Everything must be given in His way, for whatever exists in heaven and on earth belongs to Allah Almighty. Man himself, whatever he possesses, and whatever lies within him, all belong to Allah Almighty. It is therefore in perfect harmony with justice as well as reason that whatever belongs to Allah Almighty must be reserved only for Him Alone. Whatever sacrifice man makes for others or for his own benefit or to gratify his desire is indeed a breach of trust unless it be with the permission of Allah Almighty. And whatever sacrifice is made for Allah Almighty is in reality a payment of what is due.

But, one lesson Muslims must learn from those who are sacrificing everything for the sake of their false ideologies and false gods: how strange it is that, while such unimaginable dedication, sacrifice and fidelity is being shown for false gods, not even a thousandth part of it is shown for the True God by those who profess faith in them.

Where Do We Stand?

Let us examine our lives by the crucial criteria of Iman and Islam as laid down by the Quran and the Prophet, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam.

If you claim that you have accepted Islam, have you oriented your living and your dying towards Allah only? Are you living for His cause alone? Are your hearts and minds, your bodies and souls, your time and efforts, being devoted to the fulfillment of Allah's commands? Is that mission being accomplished through you which He wants to be fulfilled by the Muslim Ummah? And, again, do you obey and serve only Allah? Have you eliminated from your lives subservience to selfish desires and obedience to family, brotherhood, friends, society and state?

Have you made your likes and dislikes totally subordinate to what Allah Desires? If you love somebody, is it really for the sake of Allah? If you dislike somebody, is that too for the sake of Allah? Is no element of selfishness involved in this? Do you give and withhold only for the sake of Allah? Are you spending on your own selves and giving wealth to other people, or withholding the same, because that is what Allah Almighty wants? Is your motive nothing but to gain His pleasure?

If you find such a state of faith and submission within yourself, you should thank Allah that He has bestowed upon you the blessing of Iman in its fullness. And if you feel any deficiency, you must give up every other concern and worry and concentrate wholly on remedying this deficiency. For on its removal depends your wellbeing in this world as well as your success in the Hereafter. Whatever success you may enjoy in the present life will not compensate you for the loss you will suffer in the Hereafter due to this deficiency. But if you make up for this deficiency, even if you gain nothing in this world, you will benefit immensely in the life to come.

Do not use this criterion to test or judge others and determine whether they are Believers or hypocrites and Muslims or disbelievers; use it only to judge your own selves and, if you detect any deficiency, try to remove it before you meet Allah Almighty. How a mufti (religious jurist) or a court judges you should be of least concern to you; it is only the judgment of the Supreme Ruler and Knower of the seen and unseen which matters. Do not become happy merely on seeing your names registered as Muslims, but remain anxious about how and where your names are entered in the Register of Allah Almighty.

Real success consists in your being judged as believers and not hypocrites, obedient and not disobedient, faithful and not unfaithful, by that God who is the final Judge.